Guillermo (bluebeard) wrote in linguaphiles,

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fffast languages vs. s-s-slow languages

Oh hey y'all.

I found this interesting article in Scientific American (link!) and had to share. :D It's only three paragraphs long, so I won't bother to copypasta or summarize here.

My thoughts (put under spoiler-tag for incoherent rambling):

[Spoiler (click to open)]* Ofc Spanish is spoken faster than English. Or at least, my dialect is compared to the English spoken here (Ottawa, Canada). I mean I've heard some pretty fast talkers, but lawd, beating Cuban Spanish in terms of talking speed is pretty damn hard, hahaha. And not to diss any fellow Cubans in the community or call them slow, BUT PEOPLE FROM THe GHETTOS OF SANTIAGO DE CUBA ARE THE FASTEST SPEAKERS IN ALL THE LAND. ***R.E.P.R.E.S.E.N.T.***

"¿Qué es lo que es?" [ke:sloke:s] ---> /ke:loke:/ or /ke:hloke:/

^ Just one example. When you put 2 and 2 together shit sounds amazingly fast. Bitches from La Habana hate on us 'cause we talk "like uncivilized monkeys". AT LEAST WE DON'T MIX UP /r/ and /l/ AND SAY ONE WHERE WE SHOULD SAY THE OTHER, UNLIKE Y'ALL UPPITY FUCKS LOL. ok I lied. Plenty of variants within the Cuban dialect interchange /l/ and /r/, including mine.

* It probably has to do with syllable structure? I mean, phonetically, I should think a language that follows a easy-breezy sound pattern like CVCVCVCV like, idk, Spanish, Japanese or Finnish would be quicker. I know I can't speak all that fast in English because I'm not a native speaker, but I also know that it's because English has some next-level (fucked-up imo :D) syllable structure that's like (C)(C)(C)V(C)(C)(C) or whatever the hell (I can't remember 100%, don't quote me on this). I wonder if Polish is hella slow too? Its consonant clusters are best described (IMO) as "consonantalclusterfuck" (try saying that 5 times fast).

* Still, this study seems funny. Only 59 people? What in the seven Westerosi hells? And what is this "English" or this "Spanish" they speak of? WHICH ONES?! 'Cause I definitely know that some English speakers are faster than others (not thinking of individuals here, I mean dialectally). Like, NYC English speakers sound hella fast to me, or maybe that's just the vibe that NYC folks give, idk. But Cuban Spanish would definitely be faster than Kathtellanoth (Castilian Spanish) what with their goddamn th's and s's in every other goddamn word in every other goddamn sentence. :D

Also, can native English speakers comment on how fast y'all are in comparison to each other? I really want to know who are the fastest English speakers in the land. And I mean dialect-wise, not individually. I mean, I guess you'll have to be subjective about it since the stupid study doesn't specify dialect but there's bound to be some generally agreed-upon consensus, mayyybe? :>

P.S. Castillian speakers, I don't hate you. ;) I just don't like the constant lisping you guys have (sounds like Parseltongue, seriously). :C I can't help it; I'm sure y'all find the lack of /s/ (or the aspiration of it into /h/) in the Caribbean dialects equally disturbing. :P Funny thing is, we don't need /s/ to mark plural. It's ridiculously easy to tell whether "la casa" being talked about is one or many just by the context. Mandarin does it; y'all should try it. ;)
Tags: articles, english dialects, pronunciation, spanish, syllable structure

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